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The ideology of intensive mothering, according to Sharon Hays’ book The Cultural Contradictions of Motherhood, is commonly held among career and stay at home moms, and it transcends class boundaries as well. Intensive mothering is the expectation that mothers should give of themselves and their resources unconditionally, including but not limited to mothers’ time, money, emotional support and love. Intensive mothering is also an expectation directed toward mothers whether or not their children’s fathers are employed or considered to be “equal” participants of household and child-rearing tasks. The cultural expectation to mother children intensively implies that ultimately, the welfare of children is their mother’s responsibility, whether or not those children are under their fathers’ care. If a woman works, she is expected to make up whatever lack of nurturing her time at work resulted in. Intensive mothering is based on the idea that parenting is focused on the mother, and that the mother must respond to her child’s needs before her own, looking to him to inform her of what is best for him and how his needs can best be met [e.g. where Dr. Spock instruction states, “follow the baby’s lead,” (p. 112)]. Inte